一片空白

我什么都不想想，什么都不想烦，什么都不想听，什么都不想看。这几个星期所发生的事太令我烦恼和怀疑。

开始怀疑人与人之间的信任和团队精神。
被人在前面和后面无辜的开了几枪。

只希望能快点开工，把这些不愉快的事给忘掉，抛在脑后。

Fijitsu L1010

Finally bought a brand new 1st hand laptop that cost me $1833 after all the downloads and transfering with a wireless mouse. Bought it on Friday and finally I got the hand of it today.

Uploaded all the photos for the past month. Solved the MSN messenger after all the downloading and uninstalling and downloading again. For the 1st time, I had my 1st Skype video/call, and my 1st is to Cathy who is in Shanghai now.

So happy for what my new laptop can do.

Meeting on Tuesday for the new feature. Hope everything can be on schedule. Hope that I can receive my pay for the Taiwan project on 13th (suppose pay day). Hope that my new laptop can bring me more good luck.

Back to project hunting

Latest feature got postphone and push to later of the year. Back to finding for project again. Got to start my rounds of mass sms and emails again.

Alot of freelancers are out of jobs, hopefully I can find one thats not too bad.

Counting my blessings

Am back from Tioman holiday, enjoy myself alot. For the 4 days, I only eat sleep drink and play. That's life and I enjoy it so much that I am going back again for sure. The most lucky thing that happen is just that my left ear got water pressure and I can't hear with my left ear for 2 days already.

Beside that, I am glad that I have projects the moment I got back. After wrapping up the 星光依旧灿烂, I be doing another feature film 千言万语. Will be going to Ipoh for locations recee on 2nd May. Never been to Ipoh before, so excited. The new feature film has alot, I mean ALOT of fighting scenes and gang fights. I LOVE actions, can't wait for it to start.

After finish the feature film in July, I will have another feature film in August. 感恩啊! I am planning to go back Timoan around July after doing 千言万语, then go to Taiwan around September after the August feature film.

Aiming for my goal and planning.

Got to get back my pay from BIG COMMUNICATION, they have been dragging for too long already.

Rest and Relax

it's a wrap for the Taiwan project on 13th April. Done all that I can possible do on 14th and 15th, which I hand over the remaining to Kaini. Really thanks to my team members for being with me.

Am in Tioman now until 19th. The life here is really relaxing and stress free. Eat, drink, play and sleep.

That's life.

星光依旧灿烂

I am tired, burned out and emotionless already. Continuous days of working without a single day off since after Chinese New Year is slowly killing my body and brain. My whole body is aching and my leg is painful.

The feature film is a test for my patience. I want to kill people. However, on the bright side, I am lucky to have a team of wonderful people. Thanks to Kaini, Alvin, Jake and Jun Jie, alot of tasks and duties are a load of me.

I was told that the feature film will be out on 8th June this year, which is pretty fast for a feature film.

Might be doing another feature film after this, nothing is confirm yet. Have not have a chance to meet up with the team and Director yet.

Whatever is the case, I am going for a short holiday and relax before another new project starts.

Stretching to the limit

I hae been stretching myself to the limits since early last month. I think I am pulling too much and is exhasted and beat up. I really need motivation to work and move my engines. Everyday is a new challenge, new surprises, new hipcups, new updates. Today I am especially tired and burn out. Trying to keep everything in place and order seems like a great challenge to me now. To make it worse, when I check my email, I receive a new bomb. The bomb is a problem to me and will hinder in my work progress and schedules.

Although, I know that the pay masters don't really care and bother, but it does to me. It will mean my reputation (should I have any) and the current plan that I am carrying out.

On the good side though, it's a form of motivation to work harder towards my plan and I really am going to do and enforce it. For myself and for others. I just need support, as in physical and real supports, not moral ones. I will work towards my aim. It may fails but at least I can proudly say that I tried.

I just need enough time to enforce on it.

I am so tired and stress out these days. Just know that I be continuing REM instead of MCD, which is different from what was discuss before I sign the contract. Not sure if it's a good or bad news.

I accepted another project which crash with the REM but lucky for me, I don't have to be on set for the other project.

I am just dreaming of my holiday right now although I have not thought about where i want to go.

Just counting my blessing that I still have projects to do. Have no more feelings in project anymore.

It's been some time since I last blog, what a bomb breaking past few days I have been. Hipcups with projects and got "scream" at for a reason I don't find it justify. Whatever is the case, the projects still have to go on and filming continues.

It's Valentine Day this Sat and yes... I am still single and alone. To make me feel worse, there is no filming this Sat. So, I will most likely be stuck at home and doing nothing. It will be reat if there is filming, then at least I don't have to bother and worried about been alone and rotting at home.

Oh well, everything will be better tomorrow. I can only console myself by saying this.

Have locations recee in the afternoon tomorrow and I just receive a call in the Afternoon asking me to meet up and talk about a new project tomorrow afternoon also. Aiya, have to schedule my timing and make sure that I can handle tomorrow timing well.

Just got back home, I can't even my dinner in peace. I am not a fucking miracle performer! I can't come up with solutions with every problems! Damn!

Some random quiz

What is your True Fear? Your Result: Being Alone While you may act like you don't care on the outside, on the inside your biggest fear is being alone. You can be quite shy and reserved. You feel like a lot of times people don't really see the real you. You're afraid that no one will really truly love you, and that you will be alone for the rest of your life. On the inside you are great person, so just remember that and don't let your shy nature get the best of you! If you don't want to be a lone then you need to make an effort to be with someone. Show the people that you care about that you really love them, and chances are someone will always be there, even if you think they won't.
Where Your life is Going
Death
Commitment
Losing Someone
Looked down on
Disappointment
http://www.gotoquiz.com/what_is_your_true_fear">What is your True Fear? http://www.gotoquiz.com/">Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

What's Your Best Quality? Your Result: Out-Going Your best quality is out-going! People like you because you are fun to be around and no one ever knows what you will do next. Also you are not afraid to say or do whatever you want.
Intelligence
Loving
Personality
Ambitious
Sense of Humor
What's" Your Best Quality? http://www.gotoquiz.com/">Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Which Positive Quality Are You? Your Result: Friendship You are Friendship. Friends are those who can be counted upon in times of need. Friends are those who share in your joys and your sorrows. Friendship unites us with others beyond family and brings happiness and comfort to our lives. "Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies."
Love
Peace
Courage
Faith
Charity
http://www.gotoquiz.com/which_positive_quality_are_you">Which Positive Quality Are You? http://www.gotoquiz.com/">Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Filming starts again

Filming starts tomorrow and I should end around end May after finishing 2 peojects. Was back to work on Wed and alot of stuffs and hipcups happen. I was given alot of heart attacks but lucky everything can be settle.

1st of of shoot tomorrow and there be alot of fighting and a character will be kill off also. Quite happening on the 1st day of filming. After tomorrow filming, then we will have a break of 6 days before the mad rounds of filming continues. The 6 days, we will have to settle remaining props, locations etc. All these to do before Candy takes over from me from 15th onwards. Then I will go over to another project, which will be another hear attack and headache for me.

Happy CNY

It's CNY again, seems like I jst celebrated 2008 CNY and now it's 2009. How time flies. This year CNY will only be 2 days, which I will have to go back to work on the 3rd day and 5th day it's filming already.

I am grateful that I still have works and projects to do in this down period and my rates isn't cut too low.

Anyway, I just hope that I can handle both projects and don't have major screw up.

Sleeping disorder

It's 431am now, got to wake at 745am and I still can't get to sleep. This is serious, I have sleeping problems since my last filming date. Been only manage to fall asleep everyday at around 7am is no joke and it's very serious. I need and hope to solve this problem. Maybe when I start the project again and getting back to work again can solve it. Be getting back to work in around 9 hours time.

I just hope that the bosses keep to their promises and I just hope to work with as less trouble as possible. I am more hoping to work in the 2nd project as promise instead of the 1st one.

Am aiming to get my pay from the travelogue by Wed latest, then I can go for my hair rebonding, give mum allowance for CNY and buy some new clothes at least. Although I don't believe in getting new clothes for CNY, but I am running out of clothes to wear already.

Have afew events and gatherings this month. I just need the money. Ah! Please don't disappoint me.

New projects

Be starting new projects on Monday onwards, should be book till either April or June. However, unsure if it's a good or bad thing though.

The offer that the company give isn't that good, but whatever is the case, at least there is something for me hang on before the big projects starts.

Red Cliff 2

Watched Red Cliff 2 last night, I like the fighting / action scenes. The dialogue parts are rather draggy and I almost fell asleep. The last scene, when Jin Chen Wu and Tony Leung meet at the big grass patch, the top wide shot, I saw their marking, a green gaffer tape. That's funny for a high budget and high class feature film.

After watching, Panda came and meet us (JY, WM and CS) for supper and chat. It was Panda's birthday, so we let him decide on where to go. At first we head to Ah Meng's cafe, but reach at around 1213am, the owner told us that they close at 1am. So we head to the eating place opposite Cineleisure, but the food that Panda wanted to eat, Botak Jones is closed. So finally we head off to the muslim stall along Tiong Bahru which is open 24hrs.

Had so much fun chatting and gossiping with them. We finally decide to part at 5am plus. However, when I reach home, I still can't sleep. That's terrible! I was wide awake until finally get to sleep at around 11am plus. Not sure if should I continue on the sleeping disorder pills or see a doctor and get some sleeping pills.

Tomorrow meeting with the production company boss, hopefully I can secure the project and not having too much rate cut due to budget.

Finally watching Red Cliff 2 today, never watch it on Friday cause no one wana watch.

ST last minute ask me out for dinner on Thur night. We went Bliss at Punggol Park, the food isn't that great. Disappointed at the mussels and escargots. ST and I decided that the next time we come again, we will only drink and don't eat.

Met up with JT on Friday afternoon, he felt abit depress and disappointed due to some work issues. Before we part, receive a call from a company. Boss want to speak to both JT and me about 2 different projects. Maybe got good news.

Had 2 cups of black coffee, that when I got home I vomited. I can't really take black coffee well, so having 2 cups make me punk. Anyway, I took medicine then went out. Went to Heeren to buy Ellery's present before taking a bus down to Concrad Hotel, Oscar, for Ellery's birthday gathering. Quite nice beside the fact that my stomach isn't feeling that well, so never drink at all, just tea. Emida and Juan went also, had fun time chatting with them.

Sat night was spent drinking with AT, TC and JT at Ah Meng's cafe. Had such fun time gossiping and chatting with them. However, I think I drink too fast liao. Woke up at around 6am, vomiting like hell. Lucky no hang over.

Have been staying at home for the past few days, slacking and sleeping late. Actually, have not been able to sleep at night. Either forcing myself to sleep at 7-8am in the morning, waking at 6-7pm or not sleeping at all for days. Like now, I have not sleep for 2 days already. Don't know why but just isn't sleepy at all. Maybe I am so used to the hectic, busy and stressful working lifestyle that suddently been so relax with nothing to do, I am jus not used to it.

Feb project might be gone due to the company re-structure and budget re-work. Hope to find another replacement project soon. Meanwhile, I am chasing back all the payments for 2008 projects. If I can get all payments by this month, I believe I can hold without jobs for afew months. But I know that the longer I slack at home, the more I will go crazy and my parents will sure nag and nag non-stop. Hahaha...

Watching Red Cliff 2 tomorrow, then after that going to Ellery's birthday celebration. At least there is something happening to do to kill time.

2009 First Blog

Happy 2009 Everyone!

This is my very first blog for 2009. Hope everything will be smooth and my wishes will come true.

2009 will be a great year for me and everyone. Let's make 2009 rocks!

Aching body

Did Jacq's weeding yesterday. I can't sleep the night before due to the shoot, cause it's been like almost 2 years since I last did a wedding shoot. Went to collect equipments, then went to buy DV tapes and firewire with Ellery and Sharon. Settle for dinner after buying before heading to Ellery's house to collect the equipments which I also don't know why I put them in his house in the first place.

Anyway, I reach back at his house the next morning at 430am. Filming the wholc time until 1130pm. Burned out and whole body is aching. Carrying the camera for almost like 19 hours with a spotlight mounted onto the camera can be very heavy as time goes by.

Woke up this morning with aching arms, shoulders, back, the whole body.

I think I will avoid doing wedding shoots in future, it's more tiring than filming.

No one asks me out for any countdown tonight, so I guess I be staying at home watching tv and rot ba.