心痛

昨晚我听到一个很心痛的消息。我哭了，我已经很久没哭过了。我的心真的很痛很痛。

希望他真的会没事，一切会顺利。

You will be fine, you will be alright. Nothing will happen to you. You will be fine.

I outburst my anger at him, I don't mean to but I just find that it's unfair. He is already having such hard life and this thing has to happen. Why?!

You will be fine.... you will be fine...

Refresh... Itchy

Went Tioman last Fri and return back on Mon. Am totally refresh and recharge, that I hope to stay in Tioman forever.

The moment I return back home, open my email and I see alot of stuffs to do. Damn! Back to work life again.

Both of my legs are so itchy now that if I continue to scratch, I believe my legs will bleed and become worse. I had been attacked by sand flies. Damn!

Just got home from ktv session with my parents and kid brother for the 1st time. It's fun and special. Something that I will always remember.

Changes

My life needs changes and a fresh start. Have been reading up and doing research lately. Been meeting and talking to friends about it. If it all goes well, I will be doing and preparing for it next week onwards.

Been meeting up with Andrew alot lately. He is such nice guy and friend. Glad that I find him back after all these years.

Be going to Tioman on Fri. Can't wait.

Happy Updates

Wow! My schedules has been packed since I last blog. Been very happy and fullfilling days and weeks and many more to come.

27th July: Meeting for project

28th-29th July: Finding people for auditions

30th July: Went airport to welcome Moo Moo back to mainland. At night, went drinking at friend's apartment and had so much fun.

31st July: More finding of people for auditions

Aug
1st: Auditions. After that went drinking with another group of friends again.

2nd: Auditions

Today, Morning had meeting for the project again. Then after that, went home to sleep for awhile before meeting "Farms Family" for my another round of drinking. Hahahaha...

Going to upload all those photos taken today before going to sleep. Gosh! Another round of drinking later at night. Hahahaha... I will die of excess alchole very soon.

缘分

一切随缘吧。

????

Should I or should I not say?

Should I go with my guts feelings before the chance is taken away again?

I am really unsure and clueless. The type of feelings is back again. The last time I did it, I fail badly.

?????

Long lost contacts

Had a great time at today auditions. Get to see alot of long time never contact and lost contact artist friends. Glad that they are doing fine and looking great. Hope to catch up with them soon again.

1 week updates

It's been almost 2 weeks since I last blog. Time to update what I have up to lately. Start official preprod for FT with 2nd AD in a company that's so nice to lend us to use for free.

It has been okay and going on rather smoothly. Had the first round of audition last Friday. Wow! It's been very long since I did audition and first round only, I auditioned 16 people. What a record. But it turn up rather good, found our promising main leads.

2nd round of audition will be on Wed, hope that we can find more promising ones.

2nd AD, so far is not bad, rather hardworking and isn't overwhelmed by all the works given to her. Lost 1 xiaomei but found another xiaomei. That's good news for me. As a fresh grad, doing her very first official full lenght project and its a feature film, she is performing rather good and up to my expectations, for now.

Right now, I am afraid that FT will crush with TG in terms of schedules. FT is targetting to shoot from 15th Aug-23rd Sept, which TG is targetting to shoot the trailer either 1st or 2nd week of Sept. Did mention to both projects about the crush, well, 船到桥头自然直. I don't want to worried to much, things will come and form naturally.

Updates

It's been nice and great for me since my birthday.





Went to a friend's wedding last Sat. Had a fun time drinking all the wines. Had fun time catching up with the media friends. Went Zouk after the dinner, which was like alot of years since I set inside liao.



Then the next day, went to a wrap party at Loof.

This week was getting busy and ready for 2 feature films which I am very excited about. Feature A however, is making me panic. Cause there are ALOT of things to be done in a super tight timeline and budget. Feature B is something that I always want to do, a gangster movie.

I am glad that both features allow me to do them knowing that I be doing both almost the same timing. They are fine with my schedules and don't bother much about conflict of interests. So happy!

I just hope that both features will turn up great and well and fine. I just want to do all my best and make a name (hopefully).

A present that touch my heart

I really love this handmade present from Victor. Thanks! It really touched my heart.

Thanks!

Had a great birthday gathering last night. Loves all the presents. Loves all my friends who can make it. Thanks!

Happy 30th birthday

Happy birthday to me! Another year older, I don't know what to wish for anymore. Cause wishes never come true for me anyway.

It's not a great birthday month for me, with me falling sick even till now, it's not a great news.

First I had fever + sore throat. Then got flu when I went to did my hair in the salon. Now, my stomach is playing pranks on me. Feel like vomiting. Damn. I just hope I will be fine once I wake up in the morning, then I can fully enjoy myself at night when I meet my friends.

This is so sick. Damn!

Random Thoughts

Counting down to 10 more days before my big THREE ZERO birthday. I have hit the 30 mark but seems to have achieve nothing.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
GOALS AND AIMS
1) Do at least 5 feature films before next year birthday. Currently this year I have 2 on hand, the Taiwan one doesn't count.

2) Be more involve in the business, get more downlines and sponsors. Hit the Executive rank by end of this year. Be more proactive and approach more people and friends. I want to lead the financial freedom state.

3) To go to LA for the business 25th Anniversary party.

4) Keep my room neater and tidier.

5) Be more active in my products.

6) Go for a makeover shoot, to mark my 30 years on earth.

7) Stop falling in love with the wrong guys. Guys with wife and girlfriend, please stop looking for me.

8) Start taking care of my finger and toe nails. Stop peeling the skin Cherlyn.

9) Learn new skills. Like refresh pole dancing, take up hip hop, refresh wushu.

10) Take up a course. Thinking of either Business Management or Public Relations.

11) Start a hobby. Thinking of either tennis / swimming / bowling.

12) Smile more and think more positive.

13) LAST BUT NOT LEAST -- FIND SOMEONE I LOVE AND HE LOVES ME TOO.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Have not been able to sleep early at night since the Taiwan project ends. Sleeping at ~6am and waking up at ~3pm, is driving me crazy and I believe my mum also.
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Attended the event last Sat and I really feel alot. Bought the Galvanic Spa and new hair products. They really work! My skin and hair feel better and younger.

一片空白

我什么都不想想，什么都不想烦，什么都不想听，什么都不想看。这几个星期所发生的事太令我烦恼和怀疑。

开始怀疑人与人之间的信任和团队精神。
被人在前面和后面无辜的开了几枪。

只希望能快点开工，把这些不愉快的事给忘掉，抛在脑后。

Fijitsu L1010

Finally bought a brand new 1st hand laptop that cost me $1833 after all the downloads and transfering with a wireless mouse. Bought it on Friday and finally I got the hand of it today.

Uploaded all the photos for the past month. Solved the MSN messenger after all the downloading and uninstalling and downloading again. For the 1st time, I had my 1st Skype video/call, and my 1st is to Cathy who is in Shanghai now.

So happy for what my new laptop can do.

Meeting on Tuesday for the new feature. Hope everything can be on schedule. Hope that I can receive my pay for the Taiwan project on 13th (suppose pay day). Hope that my new laptop can bring me more good luck.

Back to project hunting

Latest feature got postphone and push to later of the year. Back to finding for project again. Got to start my rounds of mass sms and emails again.

Alot of freelancers are out of jobs, hopefully I can find one thats not too bad.

Counting my blessings

Am back from Tioman holiday, enjoy myself alot. For the 4 days, I only eat sleep drink and play. That's life and I enjoy it so much that I am going back again for sure. The most lucky thing that happen is just that my left ear got water pressure and I can't hear with my left ear for 2 days already.

Beside that, I am glad that I have projects the moment I got back. After wrapping up the 星光依旧灿烂, I be doing another feature film 千言万语. Will be going to Ipoh for locations recee on 2nd May. Never been to Ipoh before, so excited. The new feature film has alot, I mean ALOT of fighting scenes and gang fights. I LOVE actions, can't wait for it to start.

After finish the feature film in July, I will have another feature film in August. 感恩啊! I am planning to go back Timoan around July after doing 千言万语, then go to Taiwan around September after the August feature film.

Aiming for my goal and planning.

Got to get back my pay from BIG COMMUNICATION, they have been dragging for too long already.

Rest and Relax

it's a wrap for the Taiwan project on 13th April. Done all that I can possible do on 14th and 15th, which I hand over the remaining to Kaini. Really thanks to my team members for being with me.

Am in Tioman now until 19th. The life here is really relaxing and stress free. Eat, drink, play and sleep.

That's life.

星光依旧灿烂

I am tired, burned out and emotionless already. Continuous days of working without a single day off since after Chinese New Year is slowly killing my body and brain. My whole body is aching and my leg is painful.

The feature film is a test for my patience. I want to kill people. However, on the bright side, I am lucky to have a team of wonderful people. Thanks to Kaini, Alvin, Jake and Jun Jie, alot of tasks and duties are a load of me.

I was told that the feature film will be out on 8th June this year, which is pretty fast for a feature film.

Might be doing another feature film after this, nothing is confirm yet. Have not have a chance to meet up with the team and Director yet.

Whatever is the case, I am going for a short holiday and relax before another new project starts.

Stretching to the limit

I hae been stretching myself to the limits since early last month. I think I am pulling too much and is exhasted and beat up. I really need motivation to work and move my engines. Everyday is a new challenge, new surprises, new hipcups, new updates. Today I am especially tired and burn out. Trying to keep everything in place and order seems like a great challenge to me now. To make it worse, when I check my email, I receive a new bomb. The bomb is a problem to me and will hinder in my work progress and schedules.

Although, I know that the pay masters don't really care and bother, but it does to me. It will mean my reputation (should I have any) and the current plan that I am carrying out.

On the good side though, it's a form of motivation to work harder towards my plan and I really am going to do and enforce it. For myself and for others. I just need support, as in physical and real supports, not moral ones. I will work towards my aim. It may fails but at least I can proudly say that I tried.

I just need enough time to enforce on it.